Is Your Dyslexic Kid At Risk for Depression and Anxiety? Therapist Interview ft. Donna McCutchen

33% of children with dyslexia meet the criteria for an anxiety disorder, 33%, 22% met criteria for depression, and 32% had significant behavioral challenges. So yeah, the numbers certainly support that idea that kids with learning disabilities in general are definitely more susceptible to behavioral health challenges.

So let's shift gears just a little bit to some maybe mental health challenge type things that perhaps are more common. I guess we'll find out a little more. Can you tell us like what kind of mental health challenges kids with dyslexia or other learning differences might face? Yeah, so in general, you know, we're in a situation where there's a mental health crisis, right? Once COVID happened, I mean, the stress, the anxiety, the depression, and very young kids, right?

It just kind of shot up. And since then, we're in a crisis. We don't have enough providers out there to really identify and treat as well. So that's a problem in general for all children. But kids with specific learning differences, and even, I mean, dyslexia as well, really may face even more challenges, right? So the normal anxiety that is just kind of come with the times, children with dyslexia, they may even experience at a higher level, right?

When you add to the complications of trying to get through a school day reading and writing, they may have even more worries about not being able to keep up with their peers or fear of being called out in class, right? So that even complicates things a little more, right? The low self-esteem, again, that difficulty in the classroom can really erode a child's self-confidence, right? Their sense of self-worth just really goes down.

They kind of get caught up in that anxiety loop, as well as like trying to compare themselves to their peers. They feel like they're not smart or feel like they're letting their parents or teachers down, which is really tough on a child. So self-esteem is impacted. Depression. We do know that kids with dyslexia oftentimes experience symptoms of depression, low mood, loss of interest in activities, feelings of hopelessness. It can be particularly true if there are not the right accommodations in place to help them be successful, right?

Or if they don't have parents who are advocating for them, or if they don't feel supported or understood or valued for who they're really designed to be, right? And again, lastly, behavioral challenges. A lot of times that goes hand in hand, right? So they might exhibit behavioral challenges because of the frustrations that they're having with their struggles. They might seem defiant, impulsive. Maybe they look like they're not paying attention in class.

In fact, although ADHD can be a comorbid condition, right? It can be found right along with kids with dyslexia. Sometimes those challenges are just merely they're exhibiting, you know, just symptoms of having that frustration and struggle. And it's not truly a diagnosis of ADHD, but exacerbated because of their challenges and struggles that their learning differences cause, right? So that's another thing that can happen. So although not all children with dyslexia or learning differences are going to experience mental health challenges, it is important that parents are very aware and they know that the potential is there.

Yeah, I think, I guess, two things there. I mean, one, it reminds me of how sometimes I think teachers misinterpret academic struggles as kind of defiant behavior. This certainly happened to our daughter and it's super frustrating as a parent, you know, when she comes home in early elementary school and says, oh, you know, my teacher yelled at me because I wasn't focusing on my work. Right. And I think that's the case where, you know, clearly it was just the dyslexia manifesting, but it was, you know, interpreted as being defiant, which is super frustrating.

Absolutely. And, you know, that's so hard because you know your child, right? And you know their heart. And when they're told something like that, it really does impact their self-esteem and just make them feel, you know, like they're just not worthy or they're doing things wrong. And it's just so sad. Yeah. But I guess to get back to sort of actual diagnoses, I mean, I think you basically covered this, but I guess just to reiterate, it sounds like based on sort of the research and on your own experiences that you would say that dyslexic kids probably are more susceptible to depression and anxiety and other behavioral issues.

Yes, definitely according to the research. So there's one specific study, I believe it's in the Journal of Learning Disability and the statistics are pretty astounding. So 33% of children with dyslexia meet the criteria for an anxiety disorder, 33%, 22% met criteria for depression and 32% had significant behavioral challenges. So, yeah, the numbers certainly support that idea that kids with learning disabilities in general are definitely more susceptible to behavioral health challenges. Yeah, I mean, it's, I think it's not surprising, but it's still important to be aware of.

Absolutely. Absolutely. So I'm wondering, it's kind of a two part question. One is, you've covered a lot of this already, but just thinking of just sort of the daily struggles, like how can we best support our kids? And then I, you know, in the daily struggles might be when we start to wonder, is this just a daily struggle? Or is this, you know, where we maybe are like, okay, this is the point at which we might need to seek professional help.

So I'm, I guess, curious about sort of just that daily struggle thing. And then how do we know when it's reached that other level where we might need extra support? Sure, sure. Well, let's, let's start with like the daily struggles. So how can you support your kiddo, right? When they're having those daily struggles. So you definitely, some of these are very simple, right? Listen, listen, and listen some more to your child.

Encourage them to really share their feelings, concerns with you. Really hear them, like hear them, what they have to say and make sure you're showing empathy and validating those emotions, right? So, so often it's, you know, a child who's having a learning difference, they may have a hard time communicating what they're feeling and what they're experiencing. But if you give them that space to just listen to them, don't give them advice, just listen, kind of hear what they're saying, learn their body language, learn their verbal cues, but as well as their body cues, right?

Are they isolating more? Those types of things are super important. If you see that, Hey, they're kind of spending more time to themselves. They're not talking as much, right? They're not verbalizing what they're feeling. That's a red flag, right? Are they, are they keeping it inside? Are they shutting down a little bit? Are those some symptoms of depression that we need to be concerned of that type of thing? You want to, of course, create that supporting and nurturing home environment.

Like we talked about, you know, make sure your child feels loved, supported. And when they're at home, they're accepted and they can be their authentic self, right? Allow them those opportunities. Yes, they may have some meltdowns, things they, it, it may, they may come unglued at the end of the day. After a hard day at school, give them some space, give them a place to kind of go to and calm down, de-stress, allow them some time alone.

You know, to really allow them to kind of work through those feelings. And then again, a space to express themselves, right? Give them the activities they enjoy. I hear so many times, working with parents, my kid doesn't have time for extracurricular because they're not learning the things at school. So they're coming home and we're having, like we said, what they have to kind of repeat everything they should have learned in the classroom.

Not okay. Always carve out time for them to do things and activities that they enjoy. It's super important. Otherwise you're going to lose momentum with their progress. It is worth, you know, a couple hours of soccer practice or a basketball game or just going out in the yard and having free play. Super important in the lifespan and development of a child. Can't forget to do that. You want to make sure those relationships are really strong.

if you notice that your kiddo is starting to have less and less friends making comments about that, nobody likes me or they're struggling. You'll notice that when they have a friend over maybe, or you, you observe them in a play date and you see that, Hey, they're really not getting along. They're not understanding. That might be a little bit of a warning signal that, Hey, maybe they need a little extra support.

Maybe some coaching or maybe some therapy to kind of dig in to those social skill and independence. They're thinking so hard all day on learning how to do school and be a student that they might forget how to be a friend and you know how to be a kid. And so you want to make sure that we take opportunities to look at that and look at the red flags and seek the appropriate help if you need it.

And the easy things, right? The healthy habits, regular physical exercise, eating healthy, getting enough sleep. We can't overlook those things either. I know as a parent, especially as my kids started to get older, when they hit those high school ages, the demands of academics get harder and harder and it takes a lot more time. And sometimes you have to just step in and say, it's not okay to stay up all night and pull an all nighter.

That doesn't work for you. When you don't have sleep, the next day, yeah, you might get through that test, but the rest of all the five other classes that you have are going to suffer. And then that starts to be a domino effect, right? Or a snowball effect. It starts to pile up on you. So those basic healthy habits are super important as well. And you shouldn't overlook that. Yeah, I really like your emphasis on really making sure that there's time for extracurriculars or for just downtime, playing, whatever they need.

Like, it's so easy. And we've talked about this before on this channel is about how there's so much pressure to, you know, help them keep up with their schoolwork and do the extra remediation work. And all this stuff that it's hard, I think, as parents sometimes to just say, you know what, like, my kid just really needs to play right now, right? Following up on that, I think, Sonja kind of already mentioned this, but, like, how can we tell then when our dyslexic kids or kids with learning difficulties might need some professional help?

You mentioned some of those, you know, already. And that's helpful to hear. But, yeah, are there any other, like, warning signs or red flags we should be looking for? Sure, right. So if you notice, like, some of the behaviors that they just generally are a part of who they are, right? And sometimes they are just part of having that kind of neurodivergent brain, right? It's a little more associated with, you know, maybe they're worrying more or they have a little more anxiety.

Perhaps there's behavior problems that are, you know, their baseline, right? You know what their normal baseline is. When it starts to persist or worsen, even if you're, like, having your interventions, you're doing what you think you need to do to support them, but their behavior starts to decline and those symptoms start to increase, red flag, seek professional help, right? When the academic and social challenges, despite all of your efforts you're having, you know, like the special tutoring, the accommodations, when that pressure starts to build and you're not getting support from the school, you're trying to do what you can.

But despite your best efforts, those academics and social challenges, it's not moving, right? They're staying at this level. They're not improving in certain areas. Therapy could be very helpful for that, right? You may have the academic accommodations, but how are you dealing with the stress and that pressure, right? And so that's a time, kind of a red flag, the self-esteem. Of course, if you start noticing a downward spiral with that self-image, you notice their confidence is really shifting.

You see that in normal lifespan development in general, but if it starts to veer even more so, then that's another red flag. Biggest one, super important, and this is not just for the kiddo, but this is for the entire family. If you notice that this learning differences is becoming a source of frustration and family and interpersonal problems start to ramp up, this is a red flag, right? This is when the whole family system could benefit from perhaps family therapy to get in there and try to determine what needs to happen to decrease the family stress.

What supports need to be in place to really wrap around this kiddo so they can be successful, right? And the whole family can be successful. As parents, we take on so much responsibility, right? And we want to own everything that goes wrong with our kids, right? As we do that, we perpetuate even more complexities and emotional problems that go along with that as well with your child. So that's what I would say would be the main red flags.

That's a really important one, I think, to broaden it out to, because if we're laser-focused, we might not even see the surrounding family dynamics and that part happening. Yeah. Right. Also, to add to that, I think we sort of posited the question of, like, when might your child benefit from therapy? But I think, as parents, we might also benefit from therapy ourselves. Exactly. Exactly. So what forms of therapy would you recommend for a dyslexic kid who, let's say, has anxiety or depression, and what might that experience look like?

Okay, so first, I would say you want to definitely seek out a therapist who has experience working with a child that has specific unique needs and challenges, like dyslexia or other learning difference. You want to make sure it's a pediatric mental health professional, for sure, because we know dyslexic children have some very unique needs and challenges that require specialized therapy approaches. That being said, if you find the right therapist, you want to make sure you're utilizing evidence-based programs, right, and evidence-based tools.

So, like, for example, CBT, it's one of the type of evidence-based therapy that's been shown to be effective in treating anxiety and depression in children. And it can also be adapted quite well to meet the specific needs of a child with a learning difference. So, that's super important. And then lastly, you want to really involve the child in the therapy process and really engage them. It's important to involve them in the therapy process and to ensure that they feel comfortable and empowered.

Equally important is to find a coach or therapist who has experience working with children and a platform that makes the sessions very engaging and interacting. If you have a kiddo with dyslexia, you already know that it can be tough to reach them, right? So, you have to make sure you're prepared and the person that is working with them is prepared to meet their unique challenges, but also keep them hooked, right? So, they want to keep going back as well.

So, definitely engaging. Honestly, technology platforms that are virtual can be super engaging for a child with dyslexia, right? It may not be such a distraction to be on the computer. Those are the types of things that might actually provide them with a lot of joy or content that's interactive, something that a child can kind of experience and play with, right? And utilize those learning strengths that they have in their learning styles.

If they're visual, what a great way to see a video screen with, you know, a concept that is explained in a visual way, maybe in an animated way. It can be super, super engaging as well. So, I think those are the main takeaways when you're looking for the right type of treatment. Yeah, that's really helpful. I have one follow-up question. You mentioned a mental health coach as well. Could you explain? I think maybe a lot of people might not be familiar.

Sorry. I think a lot of people might not be familiar with the concept of a mental health coach and how that sort of differs from a therapist and how children might benefit from one or the other or both sort of in collaboration. Right. Yeah, great, great question. So, and often people get that confused, right? So, a coach is a less clinical person, right? So, it is someone that they are trained and skilled in, especially a mental health coach is something you would want to look for.

Or you may have like an ADHD coach or a learning coach. There's all types of different coaches. But it's considered like a subacute type of interaction. It doesn't mean that they can't work with a child who maybe has complex behavioral health needs. But it is someone that is able to work on behavior change, right? And helping them develop specific coping tools and skills to help them get through their everyday life. When you start thinking about therapy, you're looking more at digging into the complexity of a diagnosis, right?

So, let's say you have a child that has dyslexia, but they have really complex anxiety or depression. So, if they're not able to make movement with a coach, per se, you might add a therapist to that mix to really dig in and look at maybe some of the past experiences and obstacles that are preventing them from making progress and to continuing to progress through childhood, if you will, right? Or to progress through learning how to manage their dyslexia, right?

How to be successful with that. So, it's definitely coaches more behavior change in terms of what are some tools I can do to help me relax? What are some organizational skills I can learn to be successful in the classroom? What does that look like? How do I learn to focus? How do I learn to, you know, like shift my attention from one thing to another? Those types of things. The therapist looks at it clinically like what is driving the difficulties?

Is there something in the past or something that I need to dig in deeper to try to break up those obstacles and help this child be successful?

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. And thank you for explaining that. I think that'll be really helpful for our viewers and listeners who might not have been familiar with that distinction. Well, and then I guess just as we close here, I'd love to hear more about what kind of services you might offer for dyslexic kids. More broadly, of course, for everyone as well, but at Bend Health, which is where you're working.

Oh, absolutely. Would love to share. So at Bend, our unique, you know, we have a collaborative care model that includes coaches, like I mentioned, therapists, as well as psychiatric providers if needed, right? Who work with the entire family to really provide that comprehensive and personalized care plans that will help your child feel better today as well as thrive tomorrow, right? That coach gives them those everyday skills, right? And then help them to be able to take those things and continue to make progress.

So we also provide that engaging and interactive content with all of our care programs to keep the attention of the child, which works really well with a child that may have learning differences, right? So through our care programs, we empower resilience, which is super important. When you have a learning difference, right, and flexibility in kids, we help the caregivers to help the entire family flourish as well, right? So that taking care of the caregiver as well.

We help build that resilience in children with behavioral health challenges as well as learning disabilities by helping them learn to cope, persevere. We work on their self-esteem. We work on helping them build independence, right? Give them skills that they can use on their own. So as they grow, they have these things, right, as they mature into adults. We work on their problem-solving abilities. So all of these things can really help a child with a learning disability overcome those challenges to really feel more confident and succeed academically and in life.

So we're able to target some of those executive functions that sometimes can lag a little bit because of a learning difference. So we can target those through coaching and therapy if needed, as well as building skills that they can take throughout their life as well. It's really helpful that it's so comprehensive like that, too. And we'll definitely put in the notes so that people can look into it further, too. We'll put some links.

Yeah. Yeah. And I forgot to mention one last thing. So we also do offer evaluations. So if a child needs an evaluation, we're able to help there, too. We offer a full-scale neuropsychological eval that can really help you understand your child's strengths in areas where they need specialized support. So we're able to do that as well, right? We can identify those academic concerns as well as the neurological and cognitive-related issues and conditions that may be impacting them as well.

And we can kind of monitor. We can go in and assess. Maybe you have a child who's had an evaluation. Maybe they're on medications if they have ADHD or something else. But we're able to go in there and reevaluate and say, hey, where are they? They started at point A. Where are they now, right? So we do the same type of neuropsychological testing that you would see in what we call a brick-and-mortar.

It's the same type of gold-standard testing as well. So that's something that we offer. Excellent. Yeah, this has been so helpful. I feel like I'm going to have to go back and listen several times myself to just remember all of the tips that you gave us. Yeah. It was great being here. Yeah. Thank you. We really appreciate your time and your expertise. And I think, again, just really embracing your child for who they are, you know, leaning into that and not spending all of your time trying to fix them.

Because that's a battle. That's not going to work, right? So focusing on appreciating them for who they are, really learning their, you know, what are their strengths. You do that by building the relationship and the trust with them. When they start talking with you, that improves, you know, your understanding of who they are. They feel comfortable of saying, hey, you know, I have this test today. It was really tough. I think I did horrible.

They feel comfortable coming to you. And you take that as an opportunity to have that growth mindset and learn from it. But also by building that relationship down the road, it decreases like those behavioral challenges too. And we all want that. We want to be able to work with our kiddos. We want them to trust us, know that we value them, we appreciate them, and that we want to learn together and grow together.

And I think that's the biggest takeaway with radical acceptance in general is just accepting them for who they are. They're not broken. They just think differently. And that's really okay. Yeah, that is so important. And I think something that as parents of dyslexic kids, like, we can't hear that often enough, right? Like, that is just so important and so reassuring to hear. Right. Yeah. Thank you again so much for being here with us.

Thank you. It was wonderful being here.